Week 51 - The most expensive gift that costs no money 🎁

Hey my friend, this week I’ve hosted the very first in-person Freelance Unlocked community meetup in Warsaw, the space for the key players of the freelance market—freelancers, recruiters, and business owners—to meet and talk 🤩

And it was good! Folks were interested in the presentations about the freelance market and the future of work: they were nodding, smiling, asking questions, but the best part was the interactive part!

My friend Piotr, an improvisational actor, immersed participants in some exercises that made them speak about what they do, and not in this “elevator pitch” emotion-free and humanless style, but in a very passionate, inspiring, and fun way.

Instead of making it a pitch (kinda business-card exchange), it was a dialogue where one person said something about what they do, and the other listened very closely, and continued the conversation, adding their thoughts with a “yes, and” statement.

For example, “Hey, I’m Yurii, and I’m growing the freelance market in Poland by connecting independent talent, businesses, and those who are bringing these two worlds together—recruiters.” And another person says, “Yes, and you’re helping professionals and companies to find each other faster and more easily to get the best results.” And me again: “Yes, and this way businesses grow faster and make more money, and freelancers are getting more projects, growing their professional value, and are happier…” And so on.

It’s just a small example of how it worked, and there were many more interesting exercises. Still, what I noticed was that it was hard for people to start “pitching” what they do. However, the moment the other person said “yes, and,” and added something from their side, the first person lit up and continued with even more interesting details about themselves.

And even though this exercise lasted for a maximum of ten minutes, it was hard to stop people from talking to get them ready for the next one 😅 And the best part is that I vividly remember every single conversation I’ve had, and clearly made good connections with those folks I’ve talked to!

tl;dr: It’s hard to open up and share interesting details about yourself when you don’t feel safe, trusted, and listened to, but when you feel that, it’s hard to stop doing that. So turn the monologue into a dialogue by listening to a person and expanding their story with your thoughts about them (not about you). That’s how you learn more valuable stuff about a person, remember them, and are remembered by them.

On another note, I’ve just started reading “A Psalm for the Wild-Built” by Becky Chambers, which I took from the conversation with Tre Balchowsky from the previous newsletter, and there was a very interesting quote:

“There were thank-you notes from villagers who had felt moved enough to take time out of their days to share a piece of themselves with Sibling Dex.”

This moment, about feeling moved enough to take the time to share a piece of themselves, went deep into my heart.

Look, the most valuable thing every person has is time, and we all have just 24 hours every day (and even less, excluding sleeping, eating, pooping 💩, etc.), so when we do listen to other people, or ask them additional questions, or send them messages, or even write them a thank-you note, we make a very generous gift.

Even though it might be taken for granted (at least sometimes it feels like that), most people care about such moments, and that’s exactly how your human connections strengthen and grow.

Of course, I’m not talking about the transactional conversations where you just need to get some info to move forward as fast as possible. Still, even them you can turn into a valuable exchange by being kind and nice, and sometimes even a single smile can make another person better than you’ve met them 😊 

tl;dr: Every communication that you have with another person is a valuable gift. People feel that, and it grows your relationships over time, and if not, look, there are 8 billion people out there, just invest your time in someone else 😉

So yeah, that’s it for this week, and if you have any questions, thoughts, ideas, or personal examples of how to build better human connections, please answer this email, or connect with me on LinkedIn, and let’s talk 🤗🤓

💡 What influenced me this week 💡

Thoughts of the week:

• “The more specific the social proof is, the better it works. If you say many people do this, or 85% from your country, city, and district do this, the difference is huge.” - Nudge podcast

• “You are constantly scanning your environment for people, products, leaders, ideas that will help you survive.” - StoryBrand podcast

• “Most small businesses and leaders (…) assume when they meet with their customer that they’re on the 5th date when actually they never even asked the customer out.” - StoryBrand podcast

• “When it comes to the actual interaction, you wouldn't be in a conversation with a high-level person if you didn't have the credibility and authority.” - StoryBrand podcast

• “Success is having to worry about every damn thing in the world, except money.” - Jiney Cash, daily quotes from the Economist

• “When you watch Carlos Alcaraz, or any master at their craft, it's easy to romanticize their talent—and to ignore the thousands of hours of work that contributed to the mastery you see before you.” - Sahil Bloom’s newsletter

Song of the week:

Book and quotes of the week:

A Psalm for the Wild-Built - Becky Chambers

“Her shoulders visibly slumped. She’d always had the ability to relax them; she’d just needed permission to do so.”

“There were thank-you notes from villagers who had felt moved enough to take time out of their days to share a piece of themselves with Sibling Dex.”

“We don’t have to fall into the same category to be of equal value.”

Tools that I use with referrals:

• Descript - for anything around podcasting and video editing

• Beehiiv - for a newsletter (that’s what you receive 😅)

• Text Blaze - to access message templates with shortcuts (like “/ty”)

• Exali - promo “FROMYURII” - indemnity insurance for independent experts in Europe

• Manus - for building complex systems and projects

Daily actions:

• tell 1 person what I’m thankful to them for

• read a self-development book/listen to a professional podcast for 15 minutes

• make a valuable post/comment on LinkedIn

• tag 15 people in my connections database

• connect with 30 interesting people on LinkedIn

• invite 5 people to join the 👋Friendworking newsletter

Weekly actions:

• transcribe one new episode of the Creator Spotlight and Personal IPO (bi-weekly) podcasts, learn something from them, and connect with guests on LinkedIn

• connect 2 people who I believe need to be connected

• invite 30 people to follow the Community ROI podcast (and ask for some feedback).

If you have any thoughts, ideas, or questions, please 👇

And if you’d like to have more 👋 Friendworking in your life 👇

See you next week! 👋